Hito [人] The character/ideogram means "man; person; human being; mankind; people; human; humans as a species; character; personality; man of talent; true man; another person; other people; others; adult."
What is a Man? First, we can all accept that a male is easily spotted by the physical attributes of the male species. Being a male in our culture does not necessarily mean being a man. How do you or any person determine what makes a man a man?
Lets begin by saying a variety of factors determine what a man is that make a man a man. A man is determined first by the time, culture and ethnic groups of which he is a member. Then as a male grows and ages the various power relationships they encounter in life along with that persons perceptions, the sensory input mode that dominates, and the perceptions of perceptions as to truth and accurate facts get involved.
Then you have to consider both the internal and external environments this person experiences every single moment of life. Then take into consideration the influences and constraints self-imposed by their own knowledge, experience, imagination, and attitudes which also are derived by the connections they encounter throughout the moments in life.
Each culture and tribe will have an accepted societal survival model that dictates to those males within that tribe as to what makes a man a man. We have to then create living patterns that are based on culture and the influence of environments and other factors and then cover both spiritual and physical aspects of life. It is this culturally defined values and rules that determine the attitudes and actions, most which are learned, applied and transmitted unconsciously and consciously by members of the individuals tribe or society.
Determining what makes a man a man is then convoluted and prone to misinterpretations that also lead to conflicts and so on. It then comes down to the individual taking the time to self-perceive, self-analyze and the self-transmutate to achieve the model of a man.
Various methods are derived within a tribe to achieve the goal of making a man a man and in one of the greatest cultures is it most apparent, the Asian cultures with concepts such as warrior, defender or simply the hunter-gatherer.
Bushido, the Japanese Code of the Warrior, speaks to the eight virtues of the samurai. Rectitude or justice; courage; benevolence or mercy; politeness; honesty and sincerity; honor; loyalty; character and self-control. All of these can be attributed toward manliness or being a man. Certainly they are all traits a good person would want to develop but often this is not what a person will go to the mat for when it comes down to dissing a man.
Some believe a man, a real man, can defend themselves. This speaks to the instincts derived from when man was the hunter-warrior. Defending the tribe from beasts of the plains and other human's they may encounter. Defending when hunting along with the hunter instinct.
A man is supposed to be strong. This is not just physical strength but strength of spirit, conviction and heart to bear the burdens of life. He is also meant to be focused having the ability to separate the chaff from the wheat of life. Then the most important aspect of being a man is to accept that family is most important then the tribe is next.
A man understands that his word is his bond. It is better than a legal contract and in our history carried heavy weight when given to others. A man is a role model for his family and the tribe. How he acts and the way he lives his life shall be of the highest standards and morals possible and acceptable to the tribe and beneficial to his family.
A man is of character and not just the personality that impresses but carries no weight as mentioned in the above traits. His character goes hand in hand with is word, his strength, etc. A man knows the difference between humility vs. arrogance and pride.
Then you add in the virtues of bushido adjusted for current times and current cultural influences then you begin to understand what it means to be a man. Manliness also means acceptance, acceptance of all the flaws, failures and behaviors that may fall short of being a man's man but understanding that this is the means by which a man grows to become a true man's man or as the Okinawan's use the term, true bushi.
A man can be relied on for anything. A man is educated. Not just academic but in life. A man embraces life completely and wholeheartedly. Being a man takes discipline, diligence and heart.
What a man is not is one who lacks a level of esteem that any perceived slight as to his manliness results in conflict. A true man cannot be influenced by the words or deeds of others causing perceptions that one has lessened that man in some way. A true man cannot be influenced to such a negative. To allow such influences demeans and deludes what a man is allowing for conflict.
Many fights are the result of some perceived slight toward that persons perception of his man-hood. It actually displays the weakness of that man as a true man will simply ignore such false things and remain calm and with moral steadfastness a sense of humility and confidence that can actually result in avoidance and deescalation.
A true man has the confidence of his convictions that are impervious to any outside influences. Manliness or man-hood is the armor created that makes conflict of any nature impossible to the man. Real men understand this and when two men meet they acknowledge one another with a slight nod of the head and then they continue on with life.
